quite the problem child of fandom

travllingbunny:

temporarilyobsessive:

The second question here has been sitting in my askbox all afternoon while I pondered, but now that I’ve got two I guess I should gather my thoughts! The “even” really did bother me and kind of still does because it isn’t consistent with Buffy’s character or attitude since S7.

I’ve seen speculation that these aren’t necessarily Buffy’s thoughts. I think they are, because it’s a little too meta to say that this is the audience talking? If we’re talking Watsonian perspective only, these are Buffy’s thoughts (or possibly what she imagines is her friends’, but I can’t see them very concerned with by Spike’s bugs being grossed out by her. Then again, there is the “we” in “We’d be better off if Severin had siphoned,” but that seems a general “we”.) And in a way, I kind of get the “even” because it means exactly what it seems to- Spike is still a vampire with an enormous history of evildoing, and Buffy hasn’t forgotten that. And right now, in her perceptions of self, she classifies herself as even worse than Spike, slayer of slayers and also sometimes little girls. Which is very sad and also very Buffy.

That second line can be interpreted in at least two ways, though- she’s surprised right now, that Spike’s getting piney over her body (much like Angel over Cordy in Birthday, as GG pointed out. “I’m more afraid of her dying than she is. What is that?” FEEEEELS), or that she’s still on this “doesn’t deserve” kick and can’t imagine why he’d still want her now that [she believes that] she’s such a mess. I’m inclined to think that, since these are Buffy’s insecurities speaking, it’s the latter.

I do like that the two lines about Spike in her thoughts establish that she’s very much thinking about him romantically (even if she doesn’t think it’s practical that something happen between them now or if she’s being avoidy), and she’s being so Buffy about it, denying herself love because she thinks she doesn’t deserve it. And some of her doubts are superficial and some are deeper, and I love that her relationship with Spike is counted in the deeper fears along with (one) Willow and XanDawn and slayerhood- all things she takes very seriously.

(I probably have better thoughts on this but I need more time for them to figure themselves out.)

(Also sidebar: I’m kind of turning to mush at the fact that she feels bad about the collector demon’s job. ljalkflskdjafsj why so perfect buffy summers)

I think that nobody at DH intended this to be seen as Buffy thinking badly of Spike, or even thought that fans might be upset over the word “even”. I think most of the people there operate under the assumption that the majority of fandom already thinks that Spike doesn’t deserve Buffy, and that “even” goes without saying considering Spike’s past.

The second line is probably about Spike grieving over Buffy’s apparent death; and in any case, it’s Buffy wondering why he’d care so much about her. I can see why some people got upset over the former, but some of the interpretations of the latter are really weird IMO. If anything, it reads more as a surprise than as “oh well, she knew it all along and she didn’t care”?!

Agreed on DH. I get that fans forget who he is- sometimes I do this season, too, because he’s been all friendly neighborhood vampire, but I don’t think that DH or Buffy have forgotten it. (And before someone brings in the Angel argument, Buffy knew Angel first. Angelus is the aberration to her. Spike is fairly consistent with and without his soul and Buffy therefore has no need to differentiate.)

I’m not sure it really is the Spike-grieving approach only because nearly all the questions are about Buffy’s insecurities, and that seems oddly matter-of-fact. (As does “Where’s Willow?” but I see that as her longing for her friend.) Maybe a combination of both- the sudden wonder at how much he cares and the insecurity as to why he would. I don’t really see it as her complaining “Ugh, why is Spike so piney again?”. But I guess it’s such a vague line that it can be interpreted in various ways.